It was months ago that Allen told me our relationship was not satisfying anymore. I watched him
as the words roll down sleekly from his soft lips. It was the gentility in His breathy voice as he
spoke that made tears flowed down freely as I stood facing the window of his self contain
apartment. Our years together flashed before my eyes. The sweetness of calling me auntie in this
way that only emphasized my babyness resonated as I looked at the last gift...a six years
Amphora wine. He was a connoisseur of some sort. I remember just how disappointed I was when
he told me he had not read Edgar's Cask of Amontillado. Although It gladdens me that Fortunato
surpasses him.
Allen had recently put on some weight and would often stand before the mirror that overlooks the reading table and pull pound of extra flesh from his belly. Sometimes he had complain with a
desire to be told otherwise. That what he is seeing is not absolutely true. Of course he is loosing
some with liftings every day.It was on one of such days I told him. It doesn't change a thing.
He smiled sweetly and said this is for me. With a determined emphasis. Nodding his head with
a fixed gaze. It made me proud of him and question just how true my my earlier stand was.
Don't make this about you auntie. He got few minutes silent treatment before a pillow spanking.
He smiled graciously with his newly shaved head reflecting under the white bulb as the pillow
moved from one hand to the other. His eyes glistening with soft tear that never drops while his
Caramel skin emphasized the whiteness of his carefully arranged dentition.
He took off the sweaty polo and drops down on the bed in front of my open legs with a coy smile
that I have soon come to memorize. He made to put his head and I quickly closed them. He looked
up at me holding my face for a while. He parted his lips while sucking the lower part. I bent low
then. His lips tasted of spices mixed with the Amphora we had just taken. I opened my eyes
temporary and met his wide open but the explorations made it hard for mine to stay open.
'that was cute' he says turning me over. The way your eyes were closed. I smile and he
plants a kiss on my head as he heads to the bathroom. I attempt getting up but fall down back on
the softness of the cashmere and ruminate.
We had first met at Aboy's place. I had gone to see him concerning the clientele and there Allen,
tall, big boned and cute was. It was hard to forget his scent. lavender. It warped the air graciously.
He was a student of Hydrology. Hydrology sounded so polished and it got my attention. I
wondered silently why he was still in school. Maybe he detected that or considers my friend who
speaks his language prettier but somehow I didn't have the full attention any more. I prayed my
friend will not recount her tales of castlu. I watched as he ate the stew I had prepared at his
insistence with deep satisfaction and it made me blush. He didn't talk to me again throughout the
period we were escorted out until I discovered I had lost an ear ring. I wouldn't stop nudging
Aboy so he looks at me and walks over to a lady who sells jewelry. His looming height over
shadows mine and for a moment there I thought how really average I must be. He got the dot
ear ring and replaced it with my missing one. He smells pleasant with his armpit raised above my
face. We said goodbye but I got his number.
Allen. I like him. His height is amazing my friend tells me on our way back. I teased her about
tall boys and she as always 'I'm not tall na' retorts. We smiled and I told her if she would like
me to talk to him. She kept mute and I didn't push it neither did I tell her just how surprisingly
fascinated I was too.
After he complained of my only calling for business, I visited that weekend and have since been.
Mostly on and off. He speaks many languages making it easy to code mix and switch alternating
between Yoruba and Hausa, pidgin and English. I listened as he tells me stories about world
characters, drug lords and international politics. He thought the ponzi scheme was worth trying
since the return is more visible than the ten naira addition from the banks.
We had started a little garden behind the house and some mornings he had hold me in front of him as I point to some of the newly sprouting seeds. At other times, he just nuzzles as I lay contentedly against his firm softness. The first time I told him I loved him was when he was sick. I had return his call that evening and the quiet slowness of his voice made me wear a gown without my lingerie. When I saw his small eyes pushing to stay open, I felt his hand then wiping the tears off my face. I held them there as we locked in shared understanding and I told him I do love him too.
We harvested ugwu and added it to our tomato stew on some occasion . He cooks while I raise my palms as he drops little for my vetting. 'How is the salt'? He had asked watching my expression like a rain maker. Once I nod, he picks me up and swirl me round the small kitchen and we had kiss.
When his withdrawal started, I asked he waved it off. My visits became less while the ugwu
leaves withered under the Harmatan breeze. It was that morning he told me:
'I want more Danny..."
holding my hands under the softness of his,
"You know I'm not there yet"
"I'm sorry'...
I understand" I told him as I gathered my toiletries from the bathroom ledge.
S.J
